Four Years Ago...

Four years ago today I got up, went to work like always and was anxiously awating the arrival of my little girl. I was seeing my OBGYN 3 times a week for a non stress test and my due date was only two days away. It felt like she was never going to make her debut. I was uncomfortable, irritable and just wanted to be done...much like anyone the last few weeks of pregnancy.

I was working at KinderCare at the time and due to some issues halfway through my pregnancy I was on a light duty and had to work with the school-age children. I'm normally an infant/toddler teacher but that summer I was mostly in the kitchen doing lunches and dishes or with the naughty big kids. I hated it. The kids didnt listen, respect me and one even hit me in the stomach with a giant wooden block. I was SO ready to go on maternity leave and contemplated just taking off a week before she was even born but knew that wouldnt be smart financially, plus Id just be sitting at home...bored!

Anyways, I was sitting in the classroom, trying to play connect four with a kid when I started feeling intense contractions. Every 5-8 minutes. After a couple hours of this I asked to go home (i was almost done with my shift anyways) and they let me leave. Went home, rested for a while...then mowed the lawn. Yes I mowed the lawn which was not so great. Im allergic to grass, 9 months pregnant, and it was a hot ass day! I was trying to get this baby outta me and my neighbor who was a week or so behind me in pregnancy just watched me, laughed and yelled at me for doing it.

It worked! Well sort of. I went into hospital and I was 2cm dilated (which i was for about a month) and they had me walk laps around labor and delivery to see if things would progress. Three hours later (about 10pm) they sent me home. I was devastated. I was only two days away from due date and because my blood p[pressure was elevated they had me scheduled to be induced Monday....three days away. I didnt understand why they couldnt hook me up with some pitocin and get this party started. I went home and cried and cried and cried.

Eventually I got some sleep but my contractions were keeping me from falling into a deep sleep. I finally gave up on trying to get some sleep, took a shower and shaved haha. Woke Justin up and said I wanna go back...mind you its like 5am, hes maybe gotten 4 hours of sleep and I was in tears most of the night so I doubt anyone slept through that. Justins dad offered to take me and let Justin sleep but I wanted  him there.

We got to hospital around 630am and I was 6cm! At least all that pain was for a good cause. They admitted me and skip a few not so needed details, she came into the world after 15 minutes of pushing at 12:30pm. Just in time for lunch :) I was starving and had my first bite of taco bell in 9 months! I was afraid to eat any of my "favorite" foods while pregnant because I  had such horrid nausea that if I threw it up Id never wanna eat it again .

Never did I think that Jaelynn Michelle would be such a great asset to our family. Sure we were young, unprepared and broke as hell, but we did the best we could with what he had. Every single day she says or does something that makes me laugh, reminds me there is still innocence in the world and is my hero. Shes taught me more about acceptance, unconditional love and hope than anyone or anything in the world. Before she was apart of my life things were hairy and unclear. Still are at times but all I need to do is to look into her beautiful blue eyes and all is well in the world again. No matter the circumstance or how sassy she is (most) of the time she is still my little girl and always will be.