Exhausted

I havent cried this much in a long, long, long time. I feel so drained. I have a never ending headache, ran out of kleenex, and my eyes are so puffy I can barely see out of them. I just want this to be over. Move forward, I really dont want to have the doctor help "kick start" the process, just please, give me a small break for once and let my body do this naturally...

On a lighter note tomorrow marks the one year anniversary of being cancer free, I dont even have the energy to be excited but tomorrow is a new day and will bring new adventures, so maybe tomorrow will be a better day.

Thanks again to all of you whove called, text, emailed, or just simply listened to me talk in circles about how this is okay and I got the answers I was looking for but still so bummed that all my hard work ended like this. I much rather be scheduling my ultrasound, hearing the heartbeat or better yet HOLDING a baby. Which reminds me, today Id be 7 months along with baby #2(from my miscarriage in Sept)...adk;jsfha;skld I wish I had more control, but for now I will let go and let fate plan my destiny.